Today, we welcome Greg from Florida to Profiles of Beskirted Men!
What is your name?
Greg
Where are you from?
Florida
Which types of gender non-conforming clothing do you enjoy wearing?
Tights and skirts/kilts
When did you start wearing gender non-conforming clothing?
Tights: as a child. Skirts/kilts: late 40s
How did you start wearing gender non-conforming clothing and why?
When I was seven, I played a medieval beggar in a church play and wore a tunic and tights. Naive as a child is, I fell in love with tights thinking I was gonna always wear them. I cried when I was told they’re just for girls but wore anyway under boy clothes. They are my security blanket and given my struggle to wear what I want, they’ve made me a more emphatic person to other people’s more important struggles. I really learned a lot about myself, life and to love myself through a lot of help from the Legwear as Unisex Fashion Forum that I now moderate (https://forums.delphiforums.com/LAUF) I wear tights openly now usually with shorts unless at work. As a physician, I wear under pants almost every day I work.
During the pandemic, Covid exhausted me and my colleagues. One day after a shower, I was lying there in a towel not wanting to get dressed. I thought how nice it would be to be able to walk around in a towel all day. Serendipitously, I spied my wife’s old skirt and thought, isn’t a skirt just like a towel? Sure enough, I tried it on and was hooked. It’s been easier now to be open wearing a skirt/kilt because I went through the struggle to accept the fact that I enjoy wearing tights as a man.
What is your motivation now for putting on gender non-conforming clothing?
Im so much more comfortable in tights and unbifurcated bottoms. So I wear them every chance I get.
What do gender non-conforming clothes mean to you?
Although I’m not jonesing for a cause, I am a cis gendered, hetero white Christian male who’s married. Not that those attributes mean anything but I feel those most against men wearing skirts fit those criteria; cis gendered white male christian whose not gay. I fear these people use the word “normal” to describe themselves and think “normal” equates to a persons worth.
To me, I can’t really define normal in terms of a person and I think every person’s worth is equal. That’s what my Christian Faith taught me.
I do not know what it is to have to fight the struggles that minorities, women, non-binary folks, transgendered people or homosexual/bisexuals do in today’s society. But when a guy like me who checks all these so called “normal” boxes steps out in a skirt as a “normal” man, I want to stand with everyone who’s marginalized in today’s society and say “F you” to anyone who judges another.
How often do you wear gender non-conforming clothing?
As often as possible. Almost daily now.
Do you go out in public dressed in gender non-conforming clothes? If not, why not? If so, how often and where do you go? Are there any places you wouldn’t go?
Yes. More often in a kilt/skirt than in tights. I live in Florida and it’s hot often.
Are there any places I wouldn’t go?
Not necessarily but I don’t really want to invite trouble. So places I think may not be open to a man in a skirt or tights, I’d avoid. But then again, I don’t really have an interest in going to places that wouldn’t tolerate a man in a skirt or tights.
Do you find it hard to go out in public in gender non-conforming clothes?
At the start of each time I go out in public, yes, it’s hard to just do it. There’s that hump you have to get over. And then after you’re out there and you realize no one really cares, you get comfortable. And although each time it gets easier, there’s still that little hitch before going out. That little thought, what if… But the feeling of being yourself wearing what’s comfortable is like crack cocaine, can’t stop it.
What is your best and/or worst experience in gender non-conforming clothes?
Best experience happens regularly. People clearly ain’t used to seeing a guy in a skirt/kilt and so I get regular compliments. In fact I’m kinda annoyed when I go out in a kilt and no one says a thing. It’s like in the beginning, I’m thinking “please don’t bother me” but then when no one says anything, I’m bummed. The compliments tend to be instantaneously genuine. Feels like it’s their gut reaction. Makes you walk on cloud nine. I have noticed people compliment me more when I wear a kilt than a skirt.
Worst: really nothing bad but I wore a kilt on a plane. Got upgraded (yeah me) and whilst boarding some loud mouthed hammerhead behind me announces ‘no there’s a guy in a skirt on my plane.’ First, it ain’t his plane. Second, I froze. Couldn’t react. I wish I could say I just ignored him but reality is I was trying not to soil myself. Then, by the grace of God, some woman ‘corrects’ him and says it’s a kilt. Nothing more said. Flight attendant did seem to keep giving me stuff but then again I was in first class. Probably do that for everyone.
Do your family or friends know about how you dress?
Yes. Friends are cool with it. Wife and kids cool with it. Mom cool with it. Sisters… not so cool with it. Could even say they become a bit cold when I wore a kilt. Friend said they were probably just bitter I showed them up.
Are there people you don’t want to know about it?
Yes and no. I do have the fear that I’ll lose some friends if they know. I shouldn’t worry as those I’d lose weren’t really into me for being me. But there’s a real fear. So far, it hasn’t happened. But I grew up lonely without a lot of friends. As I grew out of the awkwardness that is childhood, I’m blessed to have many friends. But the remembrance of those early lonely days sticks with me
Does your partner accept your clothing choices?
Yes. I’m biased but she’s awesome. She’s encouraged me as I go along.
What is your favorite style?
I feel most comfortable presenting as a man wearing a skirt and tights. So male top, skirt, tights and boy shoes. I’ve found wearing a skirt means you need to pay more attention to what you’re wearing. Difference between skirts and shorts are the former look good and the latter look like gym class.
Where do you shop for your clothes?
Online. Thrift shops for skirts (thredup). Kilts at online shops. Bought a few skirts for men marketed as such from adidas and asos to support those who support us. Tights online too. Favorites are Threads (they cater to men also) and Les Belles (also very much unisex and unquestionably for men in tights).
Is there anything else you would like to add?
I’m very impressed with this site. I’ve looked into other online sites and just didn’t fit what I was looking for. I made my own site because I didn’t find what I was looking for.
http://forums.delphiforums.com/MensSkirts
X Marks the Scot is great but they’re solely focused on traditional kilt wearing. Helpful but I wear the kilt because it’s an accepted male skirt. They’re my “gateway drug.”
Skirt Cafe was helpful initially cause they’re for guys wearing skirts. But I got tired of the fights and conspiracy theories. I’m glad they’re around but I just found there was a misogynistic undercurrent that treated transgenderism as a plague. I just don’t believe women have banded together to actively suppress men from wearing skirts.
I like your site because you have an all inclusive feeling about it. “Come as you are.” Everyone welcome. I still can’t define what masculinity or femininity means in today’s age (can you think of one attribute that solely defines a man or a woman?)
And I really love how you treat things traditionally ascribed to be feminine as a strength and not a weakness like society seems to. I’m hopeful in my lifetime that the words tomboy and sissy become irrelevant terms. Where humans are described by their attributes as human attributes and not masculine or feminine.
Do you have any links you would like to share (i.e. social media profiles or websites)?
https://forums.delphiforums.com/MensSkirts
Thank you for sharing, Greg!
If you would like to have your profile featured in Profiles of Beskirted Men, take a look at the post I wrote about it for more details.
Good profile I too wore tights at a school medieval fair our school did I was a shoe maker and also a human chess piece so had both back and white tights We sound similar personal background and love of skirts Good for you getting out and about!
Thanks Chris! Yeah, that early exposure set me down a lifelong journey towards wearing tights and now skirts. Hope you can also get out and about. Would love to hear if your experiences also.
My wife knows I wear skirts and tights she has not probably worn tights under pants or even leggings in public. But she is it a fan of the skirt so I wear those when she is not around. I wear them a lot on public especially if I travel. I have flown in a skirt, polo shirt and tennis shoes…awesome experience. I really want a kilt but no go with the wife which is unfortunate…I look good I in one as I’m in good shape. Hoping things change for men on this issue as it really is silly we can
She won’t accept a kilt??
Well, keep your head up and keep trying. On the Legwear As Unisex Fashion Forum in Delphi, there are “millions” of posts on “spousal acceptance” and how to gain it. In a nutshell, go slow, talk it out with her, be patient and always be even more loving when you’re wearing what you want.
I find blogging about my experiences to be really helpful. That’s why I started the Mens and Unisex Skirts forum. I love this site but needed a way to start my own threads and just blog. If no one else reads it, that’s fine. It’s been so helpful to just put “pen to paper.” But if others read my experiences and it helps calm the demons in our heads, even better.
I’ve worn on planes too. Way more comfortable. TSA was a bit different. Had my only bad experience waiting to load (though it really wasn’t that bad). My first experience was nerve wracking. Was sweating bullets and getting mad that I was having this reaction until the woman across the way from me started complaining about how the A/C had quit. Hahaha, oh the things we think about when we’re wearing clothing we think others may not accept
Right as rain, Greg. We are well aligned on moist all points. And very well said, too. I particularly like (and agrre with) “Difference between skirts and shorts are the former look good and the latter look like gym class.” I’m eager to explore your delphi site. Thanks for sharing. jc
Hi, the difference between shorts and skirts seems very minimal on the surface. But the comfort factor and elegance of the skirt is much greater than shorts. Even dress shorts…
I remember your profile and was impressed. You really are a wonderful pioneer.
Look forward to chatting with you on Men’s and Unisex Skirts Forum or here.
Always look forward to reading these profiles. And instructive, too. When Greg talks about “jonesing for a cause” I, as a Brit, have no idea what that means. So, I then consult my online dictionary to find that it’s US slang both as a noun, ‘an intense craving or addiction’, and as a verb for having such. Wow, I’ve just increased my knowledge of “World” English by one expression, always a good thing. But the context might not suggest as such: I would say something like “championing a cause”, which my fellow Brits would understand..
Incidentally, in Englsnd at least, ‘Jones’ is a goto surname for a stereotypical Welsh person, eg Jones the Baker. Ironic, really, in that the letter ‘J’ doesn’t occur in the alphabet used in Welsh.
.
“Jonesing” Ha! I have no idea of that words origin but I use it often. “Championing” works too but seems fairly formal. I grew up using the word jonesing as a way of saying something I really wanted.
Though my family came to America early, we did hail from Wales. So maybe there’s a little history to my love of that word.
Oh yeah, “towel” really is like skirt and I’m pretty sure majority of males use it after taking a shower without any awkward “oh I wear skirt-alike thing, I’m a sinner and gay” thought in mind.
I kinda agree to your statement “(…) hetero white Christian male who’s married. Not that those attributes mean anything but I feel those most against men wearing skirts fit those criteria”, aside from my general observation about female actually being more against it, using always common phrases such as “where are real true men today?” – might be a “regional” problem though as I’m from slavic-based country where gender-based behaviour assumption concept is probably stronger. Not even going into how much is expected from male and how little from female due to conservative mindsets.
“I don’t really have an interest in going to places that wouldn’t tolerate a man in a skirt or tights” – totally agree, although I feel like church in my case is one of such places. Haven’t tried though so maybe I should give it a go.
“I do have the fear that I’ll lose some friends if they know” – I think I understand that, although sometimes it can be that someone from your family will lose friend because there’s “guy wearing skirts”. I had this situation when my brother was asked by his friends to be “godfather” for the “Christening” thing. He isn’t into religion things so he suggested that they should ask me actually. After we discussed “live” while I was beskirted, they said they’ll let me know once everything is finalized from their side. Haven’t heard anything in two months from them so I guess this whole “Christening” was already done. Maybe they thought I will come in a dress or skirt to church too? Well, at least I saved some money.
I think society forces women to say “where are all the real men” and pine for Hollywood tough guys who kill all the bad guys single-handedly, save the damsel in distress and have perfect hair that flows in the wind for the final scene. I think reality shows women they don’t want men who put on the facade that is described as toxic masculinity because these men have low self esteem and make up for it by always trying to best another either verbally, physically or by brutally squashing others to “be number one.” The classic alpha male behavior.
But that’s just how society has been wired. And I think that’s changing. I work a lot with the younger generations and they’re way more accepting of “alternative (fill in the blank here)”.
You may be surprised by church and the reaction from the parishioners. I was. I’ve gone to church most of my life and also had a concern that old puritanical views would dominate everything. And I’m sure there are some that would and do not accept. But what group carte blanc accepts men in skirts? Every group is made up of people with different viewpoints. I feel like at church one can quote the Hibke and say “judge not, less ye be judged yourself” and people should take it seriously.
I went into my first church experience in a kilt with a friend. She had already been at the church and I figured they all knew her so it was my “get out of jails” card. I wondered if I’d go once, be uncomfortable by the stares, have to leave early with my tail between my legs… Quite the opposite. Pleasantly surprised. And I’ve read others accounts also.
It’s sad to hear that your friends turned you away due to skirting. Or so that’s the assumption and it’s probably true. I wonder if they would accept you in a skirt but because christenings involve lifelong photographs that grandparents take more seriously than anyone else, they thought no, better not. But don’t know how to say that so in classic human behavior, say nothing